Tourist Season - Book Report

Just in time for the release of Harvest Season book 2 in the Seasons of Carnage trilogy we present Tourist Season by Brynne Weaver. 

Spoilers Ahead 

Live Laugh Mortal Trash

Transcript

SPEAKER_02 0:06

Yo yo, Smut Squad, welcome back to another episode on Smut Syndicate. We are your hosts, Charlie and Danielle, and the month of Bryn continues. We have come to our final two episodes.

SPEAKER_00 0:21

That's right. So today we are bringing you tour season by Bryn Weaver, just in time for the new release of Harvest Season, which is coming out on June 9th, which means that for anyone who doesn't have time for a reread, this is the perfect recap episode. If you're not using this as a recap episode, just know our book reports cover the meat and potatoes of the story. We add in some jokes, say some stupid stuff, but there is so much more in these books. So enjoy our episode, but do not rob yourself the joy that these wordsmiths have created.

SPEAKER_02 0:50

That is correct. And for our second episode that is coming out today, we are going to be covering Love and Other Killers. If you are unfamiliar, Love and Other Killers is a novella. So we are going to be doing a super quick recap, but then we are going to be discussing some of our theories between these two different books uh Britain book series. So that's Ruinous Love Trilogy and Cape Carnage. Okay, the stage is set. Um we are diving into the seasons of Carnage trilogy, specifically tourist season. Firstly, our narrators. Samantha Brentmore as our Harper. I have mentioned before. Oh my god. Almost any time I see her name, I just lose it. She is my bae, and if it is her, I will always listen. With over 500, over 500 audiobooks under her belt. 500. I think it's like way over 500. I think it's like over 550. Like she might even be at 600 now. She's amazing. A god among humans. So just and Robert Hatchet as our Nolan. You may recognize his voice from Wretched by Emily McIntyre. He's also in the Beasts of Briar series. And once I started like digging, I realized I have listened to him a lot, a lot more than I realized. And he just does a fab job as our Nolan. He really does. He honestly. Right off the top, trigger warnings by Bryn. She mentions working with Alzheimer's disease research. And oh my god, we were right. She is smart. Like smart, smart. Smart, smart. Like smart, smart. And I love her so much. This book is like, she does such a fabulous job of like covering this in such a tender way, but also like still making it lighthearted so that it's not too heavy. And I mentioned this in Leather and Lark, but I really need to like mention this right off the top. This book is hot fuzz. Tourist season is hot fuzz. I said what I said. Like it has the same kind of like funny punny, whatever humor and so good. It's so good. All right. Enough with our rambling. Let's get into tourist season. Spoilers ahead. We opened to Harper. She's 29 female who lives in this cute little touristy town called Cape Carnage. The town has leaned into the whole murder vibe. They aren't actually murdering people, well, all of them, but everything is spooky, gooey creepy. Examples, they have a store that's called Craft a Corpse, which is like Build-A-Bear. It's basically a Salem, but on an island. Yeah, yeah, essentially. And she has been hiding out here for the last four years. Anytime she comes across some shitty tourists, normally men, uh stalking, peeping toms, that sort of thing, she murders them and tosses them into her wood chipper. Nicely named Cookie Monster.

SPEAKER_00 3:47

Every time someone does something that makes me even remotely inconvenienced, my brain immediately just goes like straight to the fucking wood chipper. Thanks to this book. Like the amount of times at work somebody has said something to me. I'm like, that's it. Straight to the wood chipper. Straight to the chipper. Yeah. It feels good though. Feels really good.

SPEAKER_02 4:06

It feels right. It helps you compartmentalize the problematic people in your life. For sure. Yeah. Um, overcomes her raven named Morpheus.

SPEAKER_00 4:14

Oh my god, this is my fucking dream.

SPEAKER_02 4:17

Which, if you don't know this, ravens and crows can speak, and they're actually some of the best talkers. It's just not very often that they live with people, so they don't really get a chance to speak that much. But I have heard them repeating like car noises and shit like that, and it is a perfect match. Like, I want a raven so bad. Yeah. Um, her raven is a true beast, and he likes to snack on human flesh. So I mean that's kind of perfect for her. Right? And she scoops it up and places some in his bird feeder. Uh, can you imagine scooping up gooey flesh?

SPEAKER_00 4:53

Yeah. I would literally do anything if it meant that I could have a raven or a crow that was my companion. Yeah, you know what? Honestly, I I believe that. One of them. It's also like the perfect relationship because she murders people, he gets snacks, and she gets a raven friend. I've said it a hundred times. She is living my fucking dream.

SPEAKER_02 5:16

Yeah, that's uh a little bit terrifying, but I agree. Um uh sh anyways, she goes to see her friend Arthur, who's like her best friend in this town. It's a sweet old man who lives in a manor. I believe like she lives on his property, kind of in his like guest house. His like garden house. Yeah, garden house, guest house. He jumps out with a knife and then finally recognizes that it's her. He puts the knife down, and Arthur is a very sad character, like he is suffering from dementia and Alzheimer's.

SPEAKER_00 5:47

But their relationship is actually so precious and it's a little bit twisted. Um his name calling though is so pretentious. I actually love him as he's just such a well-written character. At one point, he calls her like an uncouth wretch, and I'm like, you know what, Arthur? Fuck yeah. You got you're right there, buddy. You're right.

SPEAKER_02 6:08

I know I would really like I hope, and we'll discuss this a little bit more in our other episode today, but I would really like to see this book turned into a movie or a show or something like that because I would love to see the Arthur character come to life. Me too. Because he he is great. Um, then we meet Noland. He has come to town to get his revenge from years earlier. There was a car accident in his life, it hurt him and it took his brother's life. It sounds like very much like I know what you did last summer. Kind of. I never even thought of that, actually. Right? They were hit while crossing the road, and then every year on the anniversary of that day, he claims another life. I know what she did last summer. And she is the last one left, and she is going to be his crowning achievement. This is the kind of revenge that I expect from you, Danielle. So uh take notes.

SPEAKER_00 6:59

Okay. Uh, he should actually be taking notes from me. I am the queen of revenge. For legal reasons, petty revenge, not murder revenge, but still revenge. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Also, really important to note Nolan works in search and rescue and just got six weeks off to complete said revenge. That is very convenient. Yes. Very, very convenient.

SPEAKER_02 7:20

And they're like, oh, where do you go on your six weeks? I don't know, just on a revenge. Away. Don't worry about it. Yeah. Away. So Harper is at a coffee shop, and for some reason she has a human arm wrapped in tinfoil in her backpack.

SPEAKER_00 7:34

It's a chunk of leg. It's like the it's but it's a large leg chunk, and it's wrapped in tinfoil.

SPEAKER_02 7:42

Just in tinfoil. Yeah. And she's looking for her money. There's a tall, dark, handsome stranger coming up behind her, and he's like, yo, like what'd you get? And she's like, uh, meatball, meatball sub. And she's just awkward as fuck. And girl, I get that. I say a minimum of 50 dumb things a day. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 8:06

If we don't do weird shit, we'll die. Um but this is for sure us. I also can't have a normal conversation with any other human in real life. Like, I am the human embodiment of the word awkward. If someone says hello to me, I just like I have no real response. I normally be like, oh hi, how are you? And I'm just like, oh, good in you, and then just like fucking Naruto run out of there. Like, I am I don't know where to put my hands. Yeah. You don't want to ever meet me in person because it's gonna be weird for all of us.

SPEAKER_02 8:34

It's a scene. You're gonna feel you're gonna feel a way. It's not gonna be a good way, but you're gonna go away. Um so he kind of like chats her up. They're gonna go for a little like walk and talk, like coffee date.

SPEAKER_00 8:45

Which how does someone end up in a place called Cape Carnage? Is it like a come for the name, stay for the ball meet kind of situation? Is what he says to her. Anyways, this was probably the exact moment that I fell in love with Nolan's character because he is fucking witty and he's funny. And that's my kryptonite. If you're witty and you're funny, I'm done. It's over for me.

SPEAKER_02 9:14

Being witty is like my goal in life, and it's a really hard goal to achieve because I don't think you can really accomplish it. You either have it or you don't, and I don't. Yeah, baby, you're born with it, and I went well with it. Um, so Arthur calls her and he's asking about his black bag, which is his kill bag. There are some shitty tourists in town, and he wants to deal with them. And it turns out that Arthur has been killing shitty tourists for like a while, but now he has dementia, he forgets where he puts the bodies, or to finish up the job, or that there's a little thing called evidence, and he's not a guy who maybe should be killing anymore.

SPEAKER_00 9:52

You need your you need it all to be killing. Yeah, I just killed someone, but I actually forgot where I put the body. I forgot where I left the body. Yeah, which is funny. So Nolan is back at his hotel room and he's like pacing like a caged animal. He's been planning the meeting with Harper for years, and she was the one who killed his brother. So the woman today looks nothing like the photos of all the research that he's done to track her down. He's finally found her, but he's like, What the fuck? This doesn't look like the same person. Um, and he has been doing like insane amounts of research to track this girl down because she's a ghost on paper, but something feels really off to him. So he asks the hotel lady about Harper and she just like hands over where she lives, which is I would be so fucking mad if some random person tapped into my town. It is, I know.

SPEAKER_02 10:47

Oh, I would raise that's like that's small town life where everybody has lived there for a real long time. Because I live in a small town, and I remember when I first moved to a small town, you'd be like, Oh yeah, I saw like this house, and people would be like, Oh, that's Johnny's house, or oh, that's this person's house. Like everybody knows everything about everybody, and they know the last 10 people that have lived in that house. And you're like, That's a little bit uncomfortable, but all right.

SPEAKER_00 11:12

Yeah. We also meet Sam Porter, he's there filming filming a documentary, but his drone operator no-showed. Um, but luckily Nolan knows how to do that because he's a search and rescue guy, and I guess that means he also knows how to write it. So the bros are out being dudes, and Sam discloses to him that he's actually doing a little true crime thing on a serial killer in Cape Carnage called La Plume. So Nolan does a little break and entering into Harper's place and overhears what sounds like some people fucking. And he gets a little upsetti spaghetti about it, but it actually turns out it is some peeping Tom watching Harper in her house. So Nolan, being the guy who's there to get revenge and kill this girl, is like, well, let me just kill this guy first.

SPEAKER_02 12:03

Get it, Nolan. Love it.

SPEAKER_00 12:05

So he's kind of lurking, he's watching Harper. She's like waking up, she steps outside, and there's a little surprise.

SPEAKER_01 12:16

Ooh.

SPEAKER_00 12:16

Do you like surprises? Uh some surprises. So Jake, who was the peeping Tom that was like jerking it to Harper the day before, his decapitated head is being picked apart by Morpheus. Well, I don't like that kind of surprise.

SPEAKER_02 12:32

But I think I would. What a badass name for anyone. Morpheus. Now I have to go frickin' watch the movie again. But what a badass name.

SPEAKER_00 12:47

I agree.

SPEAKER_02 12:48

Love it so much.

SPEAKER_00 12:49

Um so Nolan is waiting for Harper to freak the fuck out. He's like off to the side hiding in the bushes, like watching her uncover this head. Um, but she just like calls Arthur and asks him if he found his shoes because when he's looking for his shoes, sometimes that's like another trigger for him or like a keyword that he's like gonna go out murdering. Yeah. Um, so he was not the murderer this time. And Nolan just like keeps watch from the shadows as Harper's like trying to rip Jake's head off of this spike, and he just kind of like slinks out of the shadows, and she's like, You fucking ball meat guy. And he tells her that he killed Jake and that they are going to be enemies because of the first time that they met. And Harper's like, What the fuck, man? What do you mean?

SPEAKER_02 13:33

Yeah, I thought you just met you yesterday. Look at that was a like lovely date.

SPEAKER_00 13:37

Mid her trying to like yank this guy's fucking head off this bike. Maya, her friend, shrolls up and they've each got like chopped-up body parts in their hands, and Maya's there, and she thinks that they're fake, and which is good. And she thinks that Harper's just going to be like entering into the soapbox races in town, which, like, what the fuck is this town? What do you mean we have annual soapbox races?

SPEAKER_02 14:02

This is the kind of town where I want to live. Like, everything is just so random. Everyone is just laser that just wander around to people's houses. They're just they're like, oh, I just have these like body parts and like ha ha ha ha ha, and then just wander off. Like, what the fuck? Like, nobody ever calls the cops ever.

SPEAKER_00 14:23

It's so fucking weird. Also, if I was ever like in my yard doing anything and a stranger or a friend or anybody just rolled up, bro. No. You're getting it. I'm doing weird stuff. I'm doing weird stuff in minimal clothing in my backyard. You are not welcome here unless I know you're talking about.

SPEAKER_02 14:46

But also, what is this town? This town is hot fuzz.

SPEAKER_00 14:50

I'm telling you, this town is hot fuzz. I love it so much. So we kind of do a little role reversal. Now we're Harper's POV, and she's watching Nolan from the Shadows. So we're just like tag team and bean lurkers, and I love that for them. So she waits for Nolan to leave on a run and sneaks into his hotel room. She finds his kill kit in his journal with a whole lot of incriminating evidence, including trophies, which is sliced off preserved skin with the tattoo Memento Mori on it. And all while she is basically live broadcasting it to Arthur because she's talking to him on the phone. So she takes his book and weapons and then on her way out, slashes his tires with his own knife for good measure. And when she gets home and she settles in for the little deep dive in his kill journal, she realizes who he is. He has a list of people to kill, the occupants of the vehicle that killed his brother and left him to die. So she's kind of putting together the pieces now. Yeah. And one of the names in this book on his list of people to kill is Harper Sterling. And the first person that Harper ever killed is Harper Sterling. So this was such a fun little twist, and it was right at the beginning of the book. And I was like, What do you mean? She's not Harper? Who the fuck is this bitch? I know. It was there.

SPEAKER_02 16:11

We'll get there. He is already starting to see Harper like everywhere. This guy's a goner, you know. He's obviously pissed at himself because he's like feeling mixed emotions. He's like interested in her, a little bit, you know, he's confused, but also she like killed his baby bro. And like, bro, she's here for revenge, but she's hot.

SPEAKER_00 16:31

Um, she kills people, and she kills people, right?

SPEAKER_02 16:34

He gets back to his room and realizes that she stole his backpack and his trophy book, and he is big mad. He gets the safe open, and instead of his trophy book, it's basically a fuck you come get me note from Harper. So appreciate it.

SPEAKER_00 16:49

Gives me so much anxiety. As someone who feels like they're being hunted for sport at any given moment, the idea of someone having my trophy book of all my murders just makes me want to fucking puke. I don't have a trophy book of murders, but if I did and somebody stole it, I would be really anxious, I think.

SPEAKER_02 17:09

I don't know about like having my trophy murder book stolen, but I know when I've like misplaced a shirt and I don't know where it is, that kind of like consumes my entire brain until I find it. So kind of.

SPEAKER_00 17:24

It would stress me out so much.

SPEAKER_02 17:26

I'm a little worried, but I'm also happy to have you on my side. So thank you. And so, anyway, so she had stabbed a knife into the tires of his car, so he has to walk. And he's like trying to go, obviously, to see her and get back his murder book. He takes a wrong turn, and when he finally gets there, that doc you dick Sam is out there and he's recording stuff for the documentary, and he says some random shit to him about the next spring tide. I'll have the biggest piece of the puzzle, and then just like fucking drops, like just see yellow.

SPEAKER_00 17:58

Smoke bombs out of there. I want to start speaking in weird riddles like this, and people are like, Oh, how's it going? And I'm just gonna make up some weird off the next center.

SPEAKER_02 18:06

Spring tide will have the biggest piece of the puzzle, and then what?

SPEAKER_00 18:11

Like we're not even close to what's the eye contact and slowly back away, and like every step my smile just gets bigger and bigger. That's how I want to start communicating with people.

SPEAKER_02 18:21

This is um how the cops start to get you on a list. So, you know what? Do it, man. Do it. Let's just see how that works out. Okay, and so obviously, Harper is on edge. She's like waiting for Nolan's retaliation, which is valid. The guy put a head in your bird feeder. He just shows up and he's like, I want my shit back. And she's like, Sucks to suck, baby duck. Yeah, finder's keeper's nipple dick. Right? But while they're arguing, he overhears Morpheus asking for scraps and mimicking the cookie monster slash harper's rendition of it, which it's that's so terrifying.

SPEAKER_00 18:57

That's amazing. Like everything about this book is just my life goals. The Morpheus part, not the murdering part. Oh, okay, okay, okay. Uh, is specifically, yeah, I I need a Morpheus for me.

SPEAKER_02 19:10

I know, real bad. Yeah, real bad. And so he's like, fine, I'll just go and I'll just let the sleuth seekers figure it out. And that's essentially who the Docu Dick's like team is. She's like, they'll come and she's like, you know, they'll figure this shit out for me. And she's like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, let's not be hasty here. Yes. She's like, I'll let's come up with a deal. You get rid of Sam Porter and the sleuth seekers, help me protect Arthur, you get your book back, and if you don't agree to my terms, I'll just turn your burn book into the FBI.

SPEAKER_00 19:45

So like giving cheese to a baby. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 19:48

Like giving cheese to a book. Giving cheese to a baby. Yes, exactly. Exactly like that. And she's working with so they agree. They're like, yeah, let's do it. Obviously, what other frickin' choice do you have?

SPEAKER_00 20:01

You don't have another option. You don't have another option. She's gonna shit into the FBI.

SPEAKER_02 20:04

You have to help now. Exactly. And she takes like, well, they're kind of like working on this plan. She talks to Lucas, which is the grandson of Arthur and is like, hey, I've got this backpack, it's got these goods in it. I need you to hide it. Don't look inside. If something happens to me, send it to the FBI. Straight up, I would snoop in that bag.

SPEAKER_00 20:28

100%. If somebody hands you a bag, they're like, if something happens to me, turn it to the FBI. I'd be like, okay, I would be opening it in front of them. There's no one, like, what do you mean?

SPEAKER_02 20:39

I'll double this. Yeah, no problem. And then obviously, yeah, just going into it, like, girl, girl, please. Um, and basically, her and Nolan, they kind of have like a little chitty chat, whatever. And someone was around town asking about Lucas and his family, and his mother was murdered by La Plume. They were also asking about some plot of land that he sold last month. No big D. Turns out that that was Ariel's Ariel. Arthur's burial. Wow, why did I put those words together? Arthur's burial spot. And she's like, Yeah, um, that's kind of a problem. That's a problem. And so she calls up Noland and is like, yo, there's this real estate deal that is closing in three weeks, and you gotta help me move some bodies. 16 bodies to be exact. Fuck that.

SPEAKER_00 21:38

Physical labor, rotting bodies. Yeah. I don't like bad smells. I don't like it. I don't like it.

SPEAKER_02 21:46

I don't know if anybody likes bad smells, but okay.

SPEAKER_00 21:48

I want everybody to smell good, and I feel like that's not a big ask to like fucking take a shower and wash your body, but also like physical labor. Hanging out with a dude doing physical labor with rotting bodies.

SPEAKER_02 22:05

Digging up body. Like it just there's a lot of bad stuff happening. A lot of stuff happening for sure. No. A lot of bad. Um, and so they Nolan is kind of like wondering what the fuck is like why would this person leave me and my brother basically for dead after our car crash? But she would do so much for this old man who may have killed his own daughter among with a bunch of others. Because at this point, so we know that Arthur's been out committing crimes, but we don't know if Arthur is LaPlume, we don't know kind of the extent.

SPEAKER_00 22:47

And this like the Sam Porter and the sleuth seeker buddies, they're all there trying to basically uncover who LaPlume is. And that's why they've been filming on Arthur's property and they've been checking up drones, and they have speculation.

SPEAKER_02 23:01

Speculations. Speculations. So they meet up for the first of many nights to start digging up graves. What a horrible job. Because they are also very, very loosely mapped. It's just kind of I don't know over there.

SPEAKER_00 23:17

It's like knee deep in mud and rotting corpse. No. Every night. No. Until you've uncovered six of them.

SPEAKER_02 23:26

And it's like raining, but also you have to like get all of the body parts. Do you know how many mosquitoes would be there? It's uh it sounds horrible. It sounds like a really great job. For sure. Sounds like a really great job. Uh the next day she's back at home, she's daydreaming about how desperately she wants Nolan to give her the onions. She hears this crash outside, and it's Arthur. He crashed his golf cart, which is fucking hilarious. He's looking for his kill bag, he's got murder on the mind. And again, Brynn has done such a great job with this character. She found a way you can really understand like the pain that this type of disease can cause, but again, she's doing it in such a nice, light-hearted way.

SPEAKER_00 24:09

Uh, I'm like, you're right. It is so well done. I'm kind of dealing with this in family right now, and it feels so real. But when I was reading this book, it still gives you like, yeah, it's sad because this person is slowly losing who they are. But she writes it so well that it's like they're still in there and you can still appreciate when they are. She keeps so light. She is a genius and like a professional feeling herder because it hurts every time.

SPEAKER_02 24:37

Yeah, she's our queen. She's our queen. And so Harper's kind of asking, like, why do you want that bag? And he's like, So I remember who I am. Woohoo! Why you do that to me? Why you do that to me? And we kind of get like this other side where we're starting to see like Nolan is starting to feel things for Harper. He's out on the town, he's buying supplies for him. He's like, Oh, she's gonna need some bug spray. Oh, she's gonna need this, oh, she's gonna need this to make her job easier, to make her life easier. But then he's also like at war with himself. Like, why am I helping the enemy? Like, I'm actually here to kill this woman.

SPEAKER_00 25:13

So yeah, because she's smart and a badass and she's hot as fuck. Right. So obviously, obviously you're having mixed emotions, Nolan. Get it together, right?

SPEAKER_02 25:24

Like, come on, guy. Yeah. Um, so there's a missing person's poster around town. It's for Jake, the peeping jerker that he murdered. He chopped his head off. Yeah. He didn't just murder him. He chopped off. He chopped his head off. And he runs into Harper around town. She's like, bro, like, why have you been flying a drone around my house? And he's like, it wasn't me. It wasn't me. Uh which, okay. Nolan runs into that documentary, Dick Sam, who asks if he knows Harper, and Nolan lies and says, uh, no. Who? Like what?

SPEAKER_00 25:57

You're gonna get con. You're gonna get caught. This guy's literally filming.

unknown 26:03

Right?

SPEAKER_02 26:03

He's flying drones over people's houses. Yeah, obviously. Okay, and so the next episode Butcher and Blackbird warning. If you haven't read the book, we are not really gonna spoil anything, but we're gonna weeb some orbs to weave some orbs. Harper is thinking back on a time when she was locked in a cellar in a home belonging to Harvey Meade, who is one of the best, worst uh side characters of all time. Yeah. And she was wishing that she was more like the woman who got tossed in with her Sloane Sutherland, my main bitch. That's my bitch. And her boyfriend, Rowan Kane, who came and killed Harvey, but sadly they only got to him after he had killed Adam, which was Harper's boyfriend at the time.

SPEAKER_00 26:56

The fucking scream that I scrubbed. I love a crossover so fucking much.

SPEAKER_02 27:03

Girl Me Too.

SPEAKER_00 27:05

Brynn drops this in so subtly, too, that it was just like chef's kiss. It was perfection. I like and there's something about it where you're like, oh yeah, you wouldn't even really think about it as you're reading it. Like the first time I read it, I was like, Yeah, okay. And then I was like, whoa, whoa, did you just say who are these people? What are you explaining to me, my girl? Like oh my god. Perfection.

SPEAKER_02 27:30

Yeah. Oh, one one million bajillion quadrillion person. That much well, and also because the other thing is that we really don't get a lot of book crossovers. Obviously, it's very common in GB and this. You know, but I I I don't know of a lot that I've had. Like, really, even in the times where I have encountered them, it's only been a handful of times. Um, so yeah, absolutely love it. That night she goes to the dig zone. When she gets there, Nolan's already there. He's sitting, he's made some hot chocolate for them. And so, aside from my husband, now we have another adult male who actually drinks hot chocolate. So that's wild. Um, she takes the strawberry, red strawberry syrup, drizzles it all over the hot chocolate. They enjoy their hot cocoa, they start opening up to each other. He asks why she left him on the side of the road. And her inner monologue lets us know that it wasn't her who hit him, but he won't think anything different. So, what's the point of wasting your time explaining?

SPEAKER_00 28:40

Oh, you mean if you would have just like told him the truth, then you could have I never miscommunication, miscommunication again.

SPEAKER_02 28:48

No, I love miscommunication when it's dual POV. When it's not, it's insanity and I can't handle it. But when they when you when I know, when I know everything that's going on, when I know his side and her side, then I'm happy. If I don't, yes, then I want to freaking scream. Okay. Nolan starts wigging out because it turns out that the strawberry syrup had mushrooms in it, and he is getting high. And this scene is so hilarious because, like, while he's there, someone has rolled up on this dig site. They're like trying to hide. It's also it's like rainy, it's shitty, you know. Like we've said, they're kind of in the muck, they're digging up bodies. This guy is now high. What a horrible time to not be one of 100%. Like on hallucinogenics, and he's saying the inside things on the outside, like, wow, you're so pretty. And the guy who has rolled up on the scene is Doc you Dick Sam.

SPEAKER_00 29:45

Oh, oh, oh, the worst fucking show up. But the worst person show up. Her also telling him that she drugged him. And like, not just drugged him, but like free poured the mushroom syrup. I was laughing so hard. Oh, man, she can't be fucking twisted too. Like, he is so high. He's dragging her into the river to hide. And now Harper is also freaking out because she can't swim.

SPEAKER_02 30:14

Adults who can't swim, I don't understand, but okay. That's uh that's a a weird soapbox hauler for another day, but still. Harper takes him home because she's like, Jesus, you are too high to be left to your own devices. And he's like, Yes, okay, because I cannot not be touching her.

SPEAKER_00 30:35

Yeah, he is down bad.

SPEAKER_02 30:37

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 30:38

Also, Brynn writes a simp like no one else. Oh my god, like even while they're still in denial, this is some this is an art form that she writes a yearning man.

SPEAKER_02 30:50

Like, oh god, yeah. I know I really want to like meet her husband and just study him and be like, is this are you the person? Like, how is she doing this? Who? There's no way that you haven't encountered this person in real life because it's just like she's a genius. Yeah, it's yeah. Also, she's smart, smart, like real smart. And so they start arguing, and we all know that arguing leads to the onions. So he gives her the onion. Yeah, he does. Yeah, he does. He wakes up the next day, he's feeding her murder bird, he's watching Harper because he's in live. Like he hasn't admitted it yet, but he's in live.

SPEAKER_00 31:27

He will be, yeah. Um and he just loves lurking in the shadows, this guy. Watching women work on soapbox cars, supernova hobby is for both of them. He's just like hiding in the shadows, and she's building herself a soapbox car. So that's nice.

SPEAKER_02 31:40

And of course, because we have a yearning man, because we have an enemy's to lovers, he gives his head a shake. He's like, I get the fuck out of here. Like, this is not uh-uh. I should not be doing this. He finds another drone operator hanging out, watching the manor. He makes up some kind of story and sends that guy on a wild goose chase. He just needs to get rid of these fucking sleuths. So he's like, I'm going down to the sheriff's office and I'm gonna meet with Sheriff Yates. Yeah, this guy runs the fucking Yates motel. Yeah, and he tells him, like, yo, there's been some like bad shit going on. There's people flying drones, snooping around. And the sheriff's like, wasn't that you? Like, my guy? It's not going well.

SPEAKER_00 32:23

In true Sheriff Yates fashion, he does not give a single fuck. He doesn't write anything down. He doesn't even pretend to care what Nolan has to say, but instead asks Nolan if he knows anything about Jake. Missing person, Jake. If I went to a police station and was reporting something and then they just like Uno reverse me, I would be shitting my pants.

SPEAKER_02 32:50

Well, my thing is if I had killed somebody, actually a whole bunch of somebody's and had a burn book, I don't think that I'd be going to a cop shop. Like, I always kind of that's people who drive without insurance and then speed. What are you doing? You know that you're already breaking the laws. Ten and two, my guy. Ten and two. Like, do not draw attention to yourself, but that that's fine. Um, Harper is at the hospital. She finds out that uh she had found she had found Arthur on the floor unconscious. He's doing okay, but he needs to like be at the hospital. Obviously, they're checking him over. While she's hanging out, there's a big commotion outside of the hospital room. There's some drunk guy getting crazy. He ends up knocking over this pregnant nurse, and uh Harper is seeing red. She heads home, she cleans up the mess that Arthur had left, like when he had gotten hurt. She grabs some of her belongings, she drives out of town. Okay, so she takes what is basically her kill kit, if I understand it, or is it or are they?

SPEAKER_00 33:57

It's like everything that would identify who she really is.

SPEAKER_02 34:01

It's her past life bag. Yeah. Yes, okay, so not her kill kit, but her go bag or whatever, her like memory box. Yeah. And she drives out of town and she hides it in an abandoned shack under some floorboards.

SPEAKER_00 34:16

And again, I don't know, man. I don't know why you needed to do that right now.

SPEAKER_02 34:21

But why your life girl? Why don't you hide it in your own house? But you know, what uh do you, do you? Do you I keep I keep my hidey stuff, the stuff that identifies my past life on me. But you know what? Put your stuff all over the place and just hope nobody goes into that weird old shack. Because I go into weird old shacks. Like Randos go into weird old shacks, but that's fine. She drives back into town and she is gonna fuck up that drunk tourist, the one who pushed over the pregnant like nurse, and she man naps him. Good for her.

SPEAKER_01 34:57

Yeah, good for her.

SPEAKER_02 34:58

Nolan has not seen or heard from Harper in a few days. Obviously, after they banged, obviously, he like went to the cops. He's like trying to help her out. His heart has grown three sizes bigger, so he wants to know where she is. He goes to the house, he gets there, and Harper's trying to do everything to get him to leave. And he hears some moaning, and he's like, What? And it turns out that shitty tourist is there.

SPEAKER_00 35:23

Really funny how like we had sex that one night, and then I just didn't hear from you for three days, and now all of a sudden I can hear moaning from inside.

SPEAKER_02 35:32

I just want to know what you're doing. And she's like, I'm actually turning this guy into a corpse. So what's up? In my backyard, when I've had people flying over with drones, forbid a girl have a fucking hobby. But also, girl, you also have a roof. Why don't you do this stuff under your roof? Like, I understand that outside can hide evidence, but like smells and goo. That's why. Okay, you know, my bad. Forgot about the goo. Yeah. And because there's really nothing else going on, right? They may as well have a heart to heart. And Nolan is feeling things, and Harper's also feeling things, but she's also going through it with Arthur and his disease. And she's also got like a lot of guilt for not being there, especially because Arthur had just gotten hurt, which like, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 36:23

Fair um, but also I love that they're having this like sweet conversation, getting to know each other's like demons and stuff, like right in the middle of her mid-killing a dude. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 36:34

Right? Like, you know, and so Harper doesn't really believe that Nolan likes her. He thinks that she is just she thinks that he is just acting so that he can get his burn book back. Um, but she's also like caught up in her memories about like her and Adam and like accepting help from Harvey Mead and how that old chestnut turned out.

SPEAKER_00 36:56

This is just written so smart. If you survived a serial killer who killed your boyfriend and kept you locked in a cellar, it just feels natural to be a vigilante killer after.

SPEAKER_02 37:08

Yeah, it kind of does. Yeah, it kind of does.

SPEAKER_00 37:11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 37:11

Um, and this is where like Brynn just does such a great job with Cape Carnage because it is the opening of tourist season. Tourist season in uh Cape Carnage. Uh the opening event of the Carnival of Carnage Festival. They present Beauty and the Beast by the low the like little theater that they have there in town. Yeah. And she's gonna go see it. Nolan sidles up, he takes a little seat next to her. While they're there, okay. So basically the play that they are watching, it's like Beauty and the Beast with blood. So think of the play from the Adams family.

SPEAKER_00 37:49

It's like Sweeney Todd, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 37:51

I fucking love that. Beauty and the Beast. I would pay so much money to go see this. I really hope that this is a real thing that is happening somewhere and that one day we can go.

SPEAKER_00 38:02

Well, real quick, I actually went. I have a friend who asked me to go to a Beauty and the Beast play. And I said, Yeah, of course. And so she gets us tickets and we have this whole thing planned. We're gonna go for dinner before, and then we're gonna go to the show. And it's at this, like it's at like a legitimate theater, and we get there and we're like sitting down. We got the best seats, fucking five rows back, front and center. Okay. It was a children's play. No. We had to leave during the first intermission because it was just it was just a bunch of parents and grandparents watching their children.

SPEAKER_02 38:48

I've never told this story to anybody before.

SPEAKER_00 38:52

I've been living in shame to everybody now. I have been living in shame. Yeah. And you're just like an unknown adult. We left during the first intermission and we didn't even say anything. We just got in our cars and went home.

SPEAKER_02 39:12

Oh my god. Yeah. Oh my god. I am so happy that you chose this moment to mention that because. Anyways. Oh wow. Yeah. Love that. Okay, well, I could also go to uh children's play.

SPEAKER_00 39:35

It was it was weird. Yeah, it was weird. Um speaking of weird, and now back to tour season. Now back to tour season. Um weird father-daughter relationships between Arthur and Harper, and it just melts my fucking cold dead heart because even when he is only kind of lucid and he refers to her as his daughter.

SPEAKER_02 39:58

Oh I know. I love that. And like sidebar, we're gonna cover it a little bit more in our other episode, but I'm really hoping that we get more background story to Harper because I feel like she is essentially alone. And so this guy taking her into his life, you know, number one as replacement for his own daughter who was murdered, but also as her replacement for family members that are, I don't know, non-existent, but also as his replacement for being like the tourist killer, yeah. Right, it just all fits together. So many levels, so many levels. And so Arthur warns her not to tell Noland who she really is because when people knew who he was, he lost everything because of it. Yeah, aka his daughter. Um, she goes to dinner with Nolan, she tells him how she met Arthur. She was passing through town, caught wind of this creep following these little girls, and when she went to take care of him, Arthur was already up in that chest cavity.

SPEAKER_00 41:04

So already up in that chest cavity might be the most unhinged thing you have ever said.

SPEAKER_02 41:13

I'm gonna say all the time. Already up in that chest cavity. And so now because sharing is caring, they're gonna get down and dirty. We get onions, onions, onions. Love it. They go for dinner, then they gotta go back to the river, they gotta dig up those damn bodies. They still have work to do, yeah. Man, just do it for me. Like exactly. That's why I asked for help. I needed it. Uh the next day, when Nolan is around town, he runs into Sam, and Sam has been catching, he's like starting to catch on to his lies. And so obviously, Nolan's gonna break into Sam's hotel room and find out what he knows. He finds charts, he finds graphs, he finds the red string connecting all the dots. There's some stuff talking about water and tides. He's gonna uncover the biggest secret. He has a specific time and place, and it's like the lowest tide or something like that. This guy's a shitload of for photos of Harper with like dates, times, and locations.

SPEAKER_00 42:18

Which makes my stomach hurt. Like, do you ever think about whether or not someone has gone full conspiracy theory about you? Especially since you and I make up like really fucked up rumors about ourselves to tell people just to see how far and how long it takes to get like circulating.

SPEAKER_02 42:37

Um, I don't know, because like the weird rumor that we're like breeding seahorses, I don't really know how that could go negatively for me, but maybe. Um, I think I'd be flattered. Like if they had the red strings. The red string and like photos of me. Also, do you know what candid photos of me look like? Yeah, I take photos of you every time we're together. I have a few. Yeah, and you have the red string and the room.

SPEAKER_00 43:07

So I'm not super worried about it. I don't know. There's actually just 40 printouts of you in those child glasses from Valley Village, and then it's just like different sizes of them with different red strings connecting them. That is perfect. Yes. That's the roads lead to this image. Yes.

SPEAKER_02 43:27

Um, like no. Like, again, I hope that nobody just comes out and like gets all up in my chest cavity. But get up there. Yeah. I'm more worried about my husband eating my ice cream before I get to it. So, you know, like I got a lot of stuff on my plate right now. That's fair. Can't really worry about that. Um, so after he's done snooping around, the sheriff sees him wandering the hall and he's like, Hey, what what are you up to? And it kind of feels like everyone here knows more. Than what they're alluding to. Like there's a lot of sneaky sneaky happening here.

SPEAKER_00 44:05

And if the books we read have taught me anything, it is to never trust the cops.

SPEAKER_02 44:11

Yes. Yes. That uh 100%. So we get the day of the soapbox derby. So Harper has been doing the soapbox derby.

SPEAKER_00 44:22

Basically, this is such a weird side story in this book.

SPEAKER_02 44:27

Yes, it's so weird, but also I like love it so much because my entire information about soapbox derbies comes from the Little Rascals movie and an episode of The Simpsons. Sounds about right. Essentially Soapbox Champion right here. But all of this basically came back because the friend walked in on them hanging out with body parts and was like, What are you guys doing? And their lie was, We're making a soapbox car.

SPEAKER_00 44:55

Which you could have just been like, Yeah, I changed my mind. I'm not doing this anymore. Yes, right? You could have like committed to the bit.

SPEAKER_02 45:04

She commits to the bit, but also this chapter goes from good to bad, but also it is fucking hilarious because Harper gets into the race. She's doing great, but also the girl don't know nothing about building a soapbox. So it goes bad really quickly. There's no brakes, there's no steering. She's out of control. It's on a cliff. It's on, we're on an island. Why did they do a soapbox race that goes towards a cliff into the ocean? That seems so dangerous. She can't get her harness undone. She's steering out of control. We get Nolan, the knight in shining armor. He steals a child's bike and he is chasing her down. Have you ever seen what it looks like when a grown man rides a child's bike? Oh, we'll get to this, yes. And I picture it that it is like a pink bike with like tassels, and there's like stuff. It's just so good. And of course, she is heading towards the edge of town. There's a cliff that overlooks the water. She turns and says, I can't swim, girl, again. And my heart is frickin' just pumping a mile a minute. She hits a curb, the car goes over the ledge, she's screaming, it's starting to sink, and she screams out one name, Nolan. No.

SPEAKER_00 46:20

Let me just tell you my feelings about this chapter. Nolan is riding a child's bike. Yes. With pink tassels. Nolan, who is what, six foot three and is probably built like a fucking brick wall because he's in search and rescue. Nolan is riding a pink child's bicycle with tassels. Fast enough, I might add, to catch up with her brakeless soapbox car. Even if he saved my life, the ick that this would give me would end our relationship before it ever started. No. Icked out forever. Permit ick. Can't unick this one.

SPEAKER_02 47:02

Oh, that's funny. Yeah. Yeah. Okay, fine. And of course he jumps off the cliff to save her. He's he's like how is this cliff?

SPEAKER_00 47:12

How high is this cliff? Like, if it's the ocean, we have to take into consideration the tides. That means this has is this like the seawall in Vancouver high? Like, how high is this cliff? It's a space, and what would the actual chances be of finding this girl strapped to a car in the whole fucking ocean? The ocean. Okay, but ultimately there's current.

SPEAKER_02 47:34

This is the current that you have a problem.

SPEAKER_00 47:37

Yes. Yes. First the child bicycle with the grown man on it. Now we're gonna find this girl in the whole fucking ocean. You know what? You sound like a hater.

SPEAKER_02 47:50

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 47:50

Be so fucking for real right now.

SPEAKER_02 47:53

She is gone. No, she is not. She's gone. Get over it. Pick me instead. No, number one, absolutely fucking horrible. Yes. Number two, throughout this, we have had like little peeks here and there into like the situation that happened to Harper or like someone whose name is Harper or whatever. Number three, also, like this is an insanely hard situation for Nolan because his brother died in his arms. Yes. Like this is just all of this is really horrible. It just, it's it's so fucked and it makes me really fucking sad. Um, Nolan gets pulled up by a passing boat. He starts CPR, she's got no pulse, he's crying. He's losing the woman that he originally came here to kill, and now he would do anything to keep her.

SPEAKER_00 48:40

So he rode a little girl's bike really fast in front of a lot of people to do it. And if I was her, I'd just rather stay dead, okay? Now he's crying. Come on. Fucking end me.

SPEAKER_02 48:59

Okay, well, you're you need someone that's way too manly. But also, what if he couldn't ride a bike really good? What if it had like drag wheels?

SPEAKER_00 49:13

You can't. If you're that tall riding a child's bike, you're not doing a good job. No, I love it so much. It's so funny.

SPEAKER_02 49:21

So obviously, she has go to the hospital. Like, she just died. She died. And she kind of like talks to Nolan and is like, bro, guess who is now in charge of body transportation? It's all you. It's all you. Here's the locations. Here's I just kind of threw a dart at a wall. Here's where I sure the frickin' bodies are. Figure it out. And they were so worried that she was gonna die. Better give her the onions to show her how happy you are that she lived on.

SPEAKER_00 49:52

Yeah, that's the first thing I would want if I drowned, is for someone to have sex with me immediately after. Well, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 49:57

I'd be like, oh my god, please leave me alone for a really fucking long time. She has now decided like she's gonna give back Nolan's like killbag and the burn book. She has to basically Lucas had hid it in Arthur's basement that's kind of like a cellar, and it looks exactly like Harvey Mead's basement, the one that she was locked in for days, and would try anything possible to get out of. And so obviously, this is not a place where she willingly goes, which I've never been locked in a place like this, and I wouldn't go into a dirt basement. I'd just be like, yeah, whatever I need, it's fine. Fuck it. Which is why they like that's why she had asked him to like store it down there because she knows that she won't go down there. Um, Nolan shows up to visit with Harper. As he's walking up to her, Arthur stops him and is like, oh my god, hey, um, I have a bag that I left in Harper's house. It's a pie. I'm old. Would you just be like a nice fellow and like help me get it? And like, naughty, naughty. It's Arthur's kill bag. He takes it, he hobbles down the path, and he's like, See ya later.

SPEAKER_00 51:08

You just gotta run some old man errands, uh, right?

SPEAKER_02 51:11

Like, I'm just busy. You've never seen me around town, but right now I have stuff to do. Like, exactly, bro, bro, don't give nobody nothing. Like, what do you no, don't help anyone. It's always a trick. And he explains to Harper, like, oh yeah, I saw Arthur. Like, I gave him his bag. And she's like, You fucking idiot. That's his kill bag. She freaking, what's it called? Like, locations him, and he's at the graveyard, and she's like, bro, okay, we gotta go get him. Like, they're ready to go. She's like, Okay, yeah, like I'll help you. Like, my bad, bro. Didn't realize that was his like kill bag. And just as they're about to go, Harper gives him back his kill bag and his burn book, and his heart grows three sizes bigger. Yes, it does. And they make it to the graveyard. There's this cute little dog, this sweet, innocent baby that's on his own, just barking and running around, and there's two men on the ground. Arthur is one of them. He's like groaning, he's like confused. He thinks that Harper is his dead daughter, Poppy.

SPEAKER_00 52:13

Like so fucking sad. He's confused, but he's not too confused because he still remembers how to kill a man with lethal sedatives.

SPEAKER_02 52:25

He's a little bit confused. But he's also having a flashback.

SPEAKER_00 52:30

Yeah, so Arthur is having a flashback um about finding his murder daughter, and in this flashback, it explains a lot.

SPEAKER_02 52:40

Yeah, yeah. Oh Arthur like basically tells them that he hit the guy with his cane because the guy's dog was pooping everywhere, and so he's like, Yeah, I'm gonna kill that guy, which um I don't know if that's really a reason for murder, but like you do, you do.

SPEAKER_00 52:57

For Arthur it was, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 52:59

Yeah. And Harper's gonna bring the dog back to the house that uh the tourist was staying at. Nolan's gonna deal with the body, and he's like, Okay, I just gotta go to the hotel to like get supplies, and then I'll deal with this. And when he's back at the hotel getting supplies, he runs into Sam. Fucking uh doc you dick Sam. He's got a gun, he takes him down, and he makes him go with him.

SPEAKER_00 53:23

Sam also tells him, and this is an actual quote from the book that looks like a serial killer kit if I've ever saw one. Yokay, Sam, you fucking nerd. Like you know what a serial killer kit looks like. Don't you have a drone to fly? Yeah. Nerd.

SPEAKER_02 53:39

Right nerd. Nerd. Yeah, 100% nerd. Um, and so then Harper has obviously dropped this little doggy dog off, and she's like, Okay, well, I hope that shit went well at the graveyard because we literally just left a body there, not in a grave, like someone's gonna figure this out. And she goes back, and the dead body is still chilling, and so obviously, she gave him the burn book and the kill kit. She's like, he used me, he got what he wanted, and now he dipped, and then he dipped, and so she deals with the dead guy, she goes to Nolan's room, and all of his stuff is gone. There's no medicine, there's no clothing, there's like luggage, nothing. But he didn't check out. A little suspicious. Which again, these women are so much frickin' smarter than me because I would just like first thought, final thought. I'd be like, ah, fucking bitch. Um, she hears someone talking on the phone about Nolan Road. So the hunt is on. Yeah. And like, okay, real life, real quick, this would be terrifying, but also how much fun would it be to spy on people?

SPEAKER_00 54:51

And like a phenomenal private investigator.

SPEAKER_02 54:56

Like I would be horrific. I would be good. But I would have a grand old time doing it. Let me tell you that. I would be horrible and I would get caught in the bushes, and I would just Well, you're not supposed to hide in the bushes.

SPEAKER_00 55:10

Well, that's I think that's the first rule of PI. That's the first rule of P.

SPEAKER_02 55:13

Stay out of the bushes. Oh, well, see, that's that's why I can't.

SPEAKER_00 55:17

Like So Harper fucks this guy up with a metal hole puncher. And I just love how creative Brynn gets with her weapons. It's always something twisted. It's always stuff that she just around the house.

SPEAKER_02 55:30

A corkscrew, a hole puncher, staple gun. We've got, yeah, like really if lying around.

SPEAKER_00 55:40

Brynn's like, if it exists, some damage. Yeah, if if it's an a thing that exists in the real world, Brynn will find a way to murder someone with it. Yes, she will.

SPEAKER_02 55:49

Every single time. Yeah. Um, he gets man-napped and tied up. He's at this old distillery. It was used as a kill spot for Poppy, Arthur's daughter. It's now been purchased by Lucas, the granddaughter or the grandson, which I don't know, it's kind of weird. I don't know if I personally would want to buy this spot. Uh, Sam wants the fame. He starts filming a tied up Nolan, and he's asking him about all the peeps that he's murdered.

SPEAKER_00 56:18

Ah, the old film confession trick. Oldest one in the book. I hate Sam. This guy's such a weenie. Like, I just can't picture him actually being badass enough to kidnap Nolan because he just screams five foot four to me. You know?

SPEAKER_02 56:35

Well, and also because the thing is, like, he's kind of a bad guy, but he's not a full bad guy. So he just makes he just makes me mad. He just he just makes me mad. Harper arrives on the scene, she comes out of the shadows, she's unhooking Nolan while Sam is like investigating a sound. She like threw a wrench in a corner, like idiot. And Sam comes back and Harper hides in the shadows. They have a little good guy, bad guy-ish showdown. Harper rushes at Sam. Nolan lifts him, and up and over he goes the railing, and now he's like hanging over the railing, asking for help, and he's just like dangling there. Yeah. Take that, you piss pants loser. Right. Harper and Nolan discuss their feelings and how she was like worried that he left. And she goes to grab this like key from Sam's pocket, unlocks, uncuffs Nolan. He's like, Girl, you're mine. And she starts like tugging at Sam's boot until it like falls loose and he fucking falls to the floor. And blood pools beneath him. This is so juicy.

unknown 57:44

Right?

SPEAKER_02 57:44

Also, I sound like she's like wood chippered a lot of people, but for some reason, this death, I was like, what? She just killed him. Like, yeah. It was an accident. She's been murdering this whole entire time, you dumb idiot. Like, I I don't know why this one was the one where I was like, I am, I am shooketh. They go through Sam's, like, okay, so they realize someone's coming, like showing up. So they just like dip. They go through Sam's hotel room and they take anything out that would tie like Nolan and Harper, like, to it. They get that dead tourist, they deal with his body, they're home. And since we've done everything else, we may as well have a freaking Shibari session.

SPEAKER_00 58:28

Like, okay, but not just any Shibari session. He also pierces her nipples. Oh, that's nice. Mid-banging. Oh, that's nice. Bro, you were not that kind of trained professional. And it's not like they have anything else to do. It's not like they're hiding murders and zooming bodies and recovering from soapbox crashes that turned into literal death. Like you guys are not using your time appropriately.

SPEAKER_02 58:54

No, no. When I asked you earlier, like how do you accomplish so much stuff in your life? Is this what you're doing? Yes. Is this what you're doing? Um, so Nolan goes down, he wakes up, he goes down to the location that Sam was talking about. The spot that was blow this whole investigation wide open. And there is a van, a van life van buried in the water. Yeah. He suits up, he goes to check it out. He doesn't really find anything in the van, but he gets a VIN number, he searches it up. Avia doesn't have too much info. He gets on the sleuth seekers server, he looks up the van, and there's a couple, they're like talking about this couple who like overhauled this old van to started driving across the country in it.

SPEAKER_00 59:37

But also, could you imagine being able to dive into the ocean and then remember if memorize an entire VIN number for long enough to run it back at your house, like hours later?

unknown 59:48

Right.

SPEAKER_02 59:49

How? But also run it where? Run it where? Where do you just get? I always forget that like in the states, they just like give information. They're just like, you got a question? Let me tell you your personal people's personal information. Like they don't do that here, where it's just like, oh, you want to know everything about someone? No, we don't roll like that. Um someone mentions Autumn. He searches it up and he links it to Autumn Bower, a person she was a popular influencer who survived the serial killer and walks seven miles to safety in nothing but a shirt, leaving her boyfriend behind. He clicks on the video. The person in the video is Harper. It's from her band life, Autumn and Adam.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:35

And this is also the chick from the cellar in BMB. I would be pissed if I spent years, years seeking revenge for someone who killed my brother and it wasn't even the right. It wasn't the right one.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:49

This is why you can't just go around murdering people.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:51

That's why you can't trust everything you see on the internet.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:54

Facts. He brings up the pictures of who he believes Harper Starling to be. And it the girl who drove the car into like him and his brother Billy, they are similar, but they are the not not the same person. He realizes, fuck, I almost killed the wrong person, but also the way I hated her, the way I treated her, and I was fucking wrong. What if I had killed her? And so while he's like having this little spiral sesh, yes, he has sent a message on this, like, you know, this little sleuth seekers like server, and they like they write like a little message that's like, sleuth seekers, it's time to mobilize. Like, keyboard warriors unite. Like, what also because their little homie, Doc you dick Sam, he's nobody knows where the fuck he is, like, he hasn't really checked in. He was like check in with these guys all the time. Also, these people are bored, they want something to do, and then we get the epilogue, okay? Here's the thing that Bryn does like this.

SPEAKER_00 1:02:06

She just drops a hot load on you and then fucking smoke bombs out of there. That's what she does.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:12

Exactly. Like, Bryn writes a very fabulous interconnected standalone. We just did it with the Ruinous Love trilogy, like my fave. But when she writes a fucking trilogy, she gives you a book, there's stuff happening, you're so excited, you're loving it, the whole thing. And then she gives you like the last like two or three chapters, and she just goes buckle up because shit about to get real. And we get the epilogue. Okay. Sam's drone operator. He had hired another little guy, the one who had helped like kidnap Nolan. He was kind of like hanging out. He shows up to the distillery because that's where Sam was going. He didn't know exactly what Sam was doing, but he knew that he would be there. He walks up and there's the sheriff there. Sheriff Yates. He's like, Yo, I want to file a report. Nolan and Harper, they were somehow involved. Sam is missing. And the sheriff's like, Oh my god, yes, okay, come on over here. Let's have a little talk, Sonny. He tricks him and then he busts his head into the wall. Yeah. And then the sheriff stabs himself. And we get this like little moment where he like kills Vinny the drone operator. Why? Because he's La Plume. I love this twist. I love this twist. I didn't see it coming. I didn't see it coming. I didn't see it leaving. I didn't see it doing nothing. I I saw nothing. I had no damn. It's so good. And that is tourist season. Hell yeah. Hell yeah. So we are going to be discussing our theories, talking crossovers, and the other episode that's coming out today that is Love and Other Killers. So if you want to hear all of that stuff, come over there. We have nothing to back up those theories. So this is us just throwing crazy darts at a wall and hoping something sticks. Um to see all of the stuff that we've done with tourist season stuff that we have coming up, everywhere that we're going to be, check us out on Instagram or at SmutSyndicate. But we're also on literally all social medias. Just find us anywhere. If you have any questions, comments, books that we want to cover, events you want us to attend, authors you want us to discuss, really anything, you can email us at smutsyndicate at gmail.com or you can use the text feature in the show notes. Live, laugh, laugh, moral trash.